Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Grief at Christmas Time

Christmas is by the far THE most beautiful time of the year. The lights, the music, the trees and all the decorations. The food, family, friends and parties. Everyone is a little nicer from Thanksgiving to Jan 1 and for a very small amount of time its easy to forget all the problems going on in the rest of the world or even in your own little corner.
However, for some, Christmas time isn't the most beautiful time. For some it is filled with pain and loneliness. For some it is a horrible reminder of what once was, never to be again. For some it is completely void of family, friends, money, presents or happiness.

This Christmas season our family has been dealt the hand of grief when we learned just a week ago that Brian's father passed away. As we made travel arrangements for the trip to Chicago I observed the look of sadness in my husbands eyes. I could sense his heaviness as he poured over his father's eulogy, the very one he himself would deliver just 2 days later at the service. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been for him. I prayed and prayed for God to comfort him. That he would find just the right words to speak of his father's 68 years on this earth. I know the task weighed heavily on his shoulders and yet when the time came he delivered it with grace. The pain of watching him choke through several sentences will stay with me forever. The inability to take away someone's pain is haunting.

When I lost my mom 11 years ago I'll never forget that first Christmas and the pain that was. The horrible feeling of realization that I would never again spend another one with her. And now that sadness has descended upon my husband. While he and his father weren't close per se, he was still his father. They spoke somewhat regularly and facing the fact that he will never be able to speak to him again is, I know, a painful feeling. Its a strange concept and one that your heart and mind takes a while to come to grips with. How I wish I could ease his pain. Oh how my heart breaks knowing the road of grief that must be traveled and how I cannot speed it up or make it go away altogether.
How we hate to see the ones we love hurt and yet this life, unfortunately, will always give way to pain and sadness. But God...
God sent His son and no he wasn't born on Christmas Day but I think of Mary and how Jesus' birth had to be one mixed with joy and grief. Jesus was born to die for sins of the people of this world. I can't imagine for one minute that the weight her Son would have to carry didn't cross her mind on the day she gave Him life. She gave Him life so He could save hers, and yours and mine.
And so whatever grief you may be feeling during this Christmas season allow your Heavenly Father to fill your heart with Joy, after all, that is why He came. I'm not saying you have to be happy, you may not have one thing to "feel" happy about but you can always choose Joy because Joy is a fruit of the spirit and we can have it and choose it because we know what Jesus did for us on that cross. Because we know that joy comes from knowing our Heavenly Father LOVES US and when we ABIDE in HIM our JOY may be FULL or complete. See John 15:8-11

CHOOSE JOY AND I PROMISE YOU CAN HAVE A 
MERRY CHRISTMAS. 

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Oops, I almost forgot!

At the end of September, JG and I took a trip to Oklahoma for a family reunion. It was a truly wonderful time. I met family I didn't know existed and they were all amazing.
I also had a blast being able to introduce JG to everyone. Of course she was a hit. Enjoy our reunion in pictures (yes they will be out of order). 

Me and my bff, Jeanette.


This pic was taken on the final morning of the reunion.
I'm sorry these aren't in order. 
My sister, Sarah and my mom's cousin Anne. 
My Papa (second from left) his 2 nephew's and son (far right). 
My Papa's 96 year old sister Winnie and her two "kids".
We had soooo much fun hanging out. 

JG and her new friend Anna. If I'm thinking correctly,
they are third cousins. 
Papa and his little Chinese Granddaughter. 


Thank goodness for Kathy, if it wasn't for her there would be no
good pics from our time together.  






LOVE me some Aunt Holly.

JG with her GREAT Aunt Holly, her
GREAT GREAT Aunt Winnie
and her Great Grandfather. 



She was a great travel buddy but I was still thankful for
a travel DVD player, that you might notice is playing FROZEN. 
and for her finally falling asleep

This is JG's adopted Papa Craig. 

I'm sad this is blurry. 



My sister's oldest daughter, Aireanna.  
Aunt Holly's first grandbaby, Madelynn. 
Anne was JG's bff all weekend.

My wonderful cousin, Jeff, Cheri and their lovely girls. 
Me and my sister!
JG and I did a bathroom selfie. :)
Cousins.  
It took three times to get a decent one and it was still blurry. grrrrr 
Heather.  
JG and her first carousel ride. 


I got to have another reunion, with all my Oklahoma friends. This is Shannon.  
I was so happy JG got to meet my bff, Jeanette.  
Papa Craig and Mimi Barb got to meet JG for the first time
and spoiled her rotten. 






JG hanging out with her Great Grammy. This was a precious time. 




JG loved Madelynn so much she named her doll back home Madelynn. 
JG got to meet OLAF!!! Thanks Mark and Stacie.

There were several others that, for one reason or another, refused to post. But you get the idea. The truth is, I posted this more for me than you anyway. :)
As much as I would never want to live in Oklahoma again spending that week there with my family and close friends warmed my heart and reminded me that at the end of it all there is NOTHING like family. 
Have a blessed week and don't eat too much turkey! :)